Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Where is the hickey?
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
