Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
