It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
grandma shit on top of the toilet
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
