Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
