You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Randomize
