i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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