Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Randomize
