So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize