It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
