I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Randomize
