you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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