So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
