You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
