halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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