using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
