I'm gonna have a badass scar
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize
