I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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