Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Michael Bay diarrhea
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
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i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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