So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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