We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
