And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize