ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
