My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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