3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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