I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
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I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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