You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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