everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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