Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize