Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
