i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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