and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
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Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
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I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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