Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
