worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
