the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
