Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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