and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
