i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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