Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
