Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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