i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
If I die, sorry about rent.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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