just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?