I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize