C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
