grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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