remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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