You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
