I think my vagina is haunted
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
