Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
honey bunches of taint.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
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