Rock
Scissors
Fuck
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Randomize