It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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