We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Randomize