Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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